All We Know For Sure Is That James Has Gone Rogue
29/2/16
By Ray Daley
The office has finally returned to a state that is now fast approaching normality. What ever the hell that might be.
The news crew behind me are already reporting their lies every fifteen minutes, doling them out in sound-bite sized pieces to the baying masses, still hungry for their updates. “We know for sure he’s gone rogue!”
Lie number one. He didn’t go rogue. We aren’t exactly sure why he logged off, stood up and walked out.
“The trail of bodies he left in his wake have barely had time to cool.”
Lie number two. He didn’t kill anyone. He pushed one man over, that was the supervisor who tried to stop him leaving. And that guy picked himself up off the ground moments after our colleague had left the room.
“This frustrated psychopath finally cracked. Once, a mild mannered administrator…”
There’s lie number three. He wasn’t crazy, just highly strung. And lie number four too, he was a bloody telephone operator!
“We’ve been told we can only expect the body count to increase from this point on.”
Lie number five. He hasn’t killed anyone. How can a zero body count increase? Unless the media are out there now, murdering people in his wake, just to make their lies reality?
“The reports are still sporadic, but we are receiving updates about new victims all the time..”
How? Did the press team send their own hitmen after him? Are they killing people themselves, just to keep the story in the headlines?
“This information just in! We’ve had reports of a killing on the High Street.”
That’d be difficult, he doesn’t even take that route home. I decide I’ve had enough at that point.
“And we are…”
This is where I step in, excuse me.
“Lying to you. Sorry ladies and gents, but I’ve got to cut these idiots off and tell you the truth. I work with James. He didn’t kill anyone. He didn’t go rogue. There’s no trail of bodies. He didn’t kill anyone in the High Street, his route home doesn’t even go in that direction! He’s a nice guy. He just had a bad day on the phones. He stood up, logged off, pushed over a supervisor and left. That’s all we know for sure. Don’t listen to the news. These folks are lying to you. They’ve already murdered three innocent people that we’re aware of here. And that’s just to keep this lie in the headlines. All we know for sure is that James left. Anything else is pure speculation. I now return you to your regularly scheduled program.”
I’ve always wanted to say that. It certainly leaves the Press in utter confusion. They have to cut to commercials, with nothing more to report here. I just hope James comes back to work soon. We miss his smile.
THE END.
AUTHORS NOTES:- I wrote this during the 1st week of on-floor academy at Severn Trent. James did vanish during the day. I was told he logged out, stood up, and left. And never returned. I never even saw him leave. I had a few tries at selling this, no-one wanted it, so I’m giving it away for free on the blog.
